livin' on cruise control

I got in the car today and headed to the next town, but something just wasn't right.  My car didn't want to stay at the same speed today, it just kept slowing down.  I'd speed up again and set my cruise control, only to have the car slowing down again.  Then I realized what was wrong.  My cruise control wasn't working.  I tried at least 5 more times to get it to work, but as much as I wanted it to, something was just not right.

Pretty much anytime I'm driving on the interstate, I set my car on cruise control.  Even if it's just for a few miles, it's become somewhat of a habit.  I set the car on cruise and just relax my foot for the drive.  Too often I find myself just letting my brain go on cruise control as well and that's when the problem starts.

I remember the last time I was pulled over was on a Sunday morning.  Yes.  It was about a year ago and I was taking the very familiar drive to church, about to turn on the interstate when I saw the flashing lights.  And it felt as though my heart just stopped.  And when it started again I realized I had been completely lost in my thoughts, just letting the car drive me to my destination.

Bad things happen when we just let ourselves mentally "coast" while driving and in life.  Thankfully, that morning, the "bad thing" became a good thing because it came in the form of a warning.

If you were to look up cruise control on wikipedia,  here's the "definition": 

Cruise control (sometimes known as speed control or autocruise) is a system that automatically controls the speed of a motor vehicle. The system takes over the throttle of the car to maintain a steady speed as set by the driver.

Yes.  This is just a definition about a device, but I think the key is how something else "takes over" the course that the driver has set.  When I use cruise control, my foot is essentially not in control of the speed of the car for as long as I let the cruise control it.  

It's funny because I really use cruise control to keep me out of trouble by keeping my speed in check.  But when I let my mind wander, there's where the problem comes in.

And this is what I was thinking about today...when I was jolted by the fact that my usual way wasn't working...for too long I have been on cruise control spiritually.  We were never meant to cruise through life without consideration.  In fact, we are warned in 1 Peter 5:8 to "be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil walks about like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour."  

For me, I'm realizing now how I have been on cruise control in several areas of my life.  Food is a big one.  So now, I'm having to be on extra alert to make changes that would have been more apparent had I been watchful for the enemy trying to fill me with physical pleasures instead of the spiritual pleasures I was made for.  I can tell this is going to be a tough journey because cruise control has become my norm.

So as you pray for me, I will be praying for you. What areas of your life have you placed on cruise control?  Together, let's be watchful of how the enemy is seeking to devour areas of our lives that belong to God!  I'm right there beside you trying to keep my foot on the pedal...or better yet...letting God take control.

Being Intentional

Investing time purposefully 

iN order 

To be 

Everything 

that God

iNtended for me to be! 

This takes planning, sacrificing my desires, and being 

Interested in the things that really matter each day.  I can 

Only do this with God's power at work within me.  

Nothing I do in my own strength has ever helped me to 

Accomplish being intentional in the things that are most important in my 

Life.

Heavenly Father, you know that I desire to live with intentionality and quit only having good intentions in every area of my life.  Help me to rely on your strength each day, taking one day at a time to intentionally accomplish what You have placed before me to do.  You are so patient with me and I'm humbled again and again that You will even allow me to be a part of Your great plan in people's lives.  Help me to make my life matter for your kingdom by living intentionally with your purpose each day.

Amen

a weekend away!

I'm so excited because I'm heading out with some friends this afternoon for the Women's Prayer & Evangelism Conference in Ridgecrest, NC.  Aahh...it's a beautiful day here so I can't wait to head toward the mountains!

In honor of my trip, I thought I would just share with you my thoughts when I came back from this same conference two years ago. The following was originally posted on September 13, 2008, entitled An Endless List. 

Have a great weekend!

_________________________________________

I just got back from an amazing weekend at the Women's Prayer & Evangelism Conference. God is so good and I was able to hear from some gifted women who have encouraged me to renew my personal prayer life in fresh ways. So...when I got home tonight, eager to begin with my new prayer journal, I wanted to begin with praise, preparing my journal for exciting reminders of who God is. God quickly gave me the idea of pulling out magazines I had around the house and starting on a "collage" of words that portray names and descriptions of who He is. As I turned the pages again and again, it was not difficult to cut out an abundance of words that describe our Heavenly Father. 

The reason this was easy, however, was because advertisements use so many descriptions to describe their products that are actually words meant to describe the One True God. I was convicted again. How many times am I sold on products to make me better, prettier, etc., things that can easily become idols in my life? Ask God to reveal to you what people or things have taken His place. What words do you use to describe insignificant things that should maybe be reserved for worshipping Him alone? Believer, be renewed today in your definition of who God is. If you have yet to know a relationship with God, read the following list, knowing that God wants to become these qualities in your life! The capitalized words are the ones I found (in just 3 secular magazines) to just begin to describe God. Let me know what names God has given you lately. How has He revealed Himself to you?

God is....

the PERFECTOR of our faith
standing with ARMS WIDE OPEN
PERSONAL
longing to be your DAD
our ROCK
saying "I WANT TO HOLD YOUR HAND"
LIFE
waiting to be your EVERYTHING
CLOSE to you at all times
JOYFUL as He sings over you
still in the work of SAVING those who are lost
FLAWLESS
longing to SATISFY your every desire
AVAILABLE to CALM every stress, every fear, every worry
waiting for you to see his VISION
THE KEY to ETERNITY
the ONLY true answer
MASTER
the FREEDOM you are longing for
MORE than you can ever imagine
I AM
EVERYWHERE, watching and listening 24 HOURS, 7 days a week, and he NEVER SLEEPS
WATER to our thirsty, dry bones
STRONGER than our strongest moment
a JUST God, DIVINELY ruling His creation, and always RIGHT
waiting for you to COME AS YOU ARE
coveting a RELATIONSHIP with you
LORD over all
the only One who truly RADIATES WARMTH
to be TREASURED greatly
THE ONE, THE ONLY
still doing works BEYOND our comprehension
POWERFUL
wanting to speak to you through His LOVE LETTER
AGELESS
our SOLUTION
in CONTROL
ULTIMATE
our GUIDE
ready to COMMUNICATE in a PERSONAL way with you DAILY
BEAUTIFUL
the One who CHANGES EVERYTHING
STRENGTHENING
a God of HARMONY
offering you REST
RESTORATIVE
wanting to be your CLOSEST FRIEND
able to claim VICTORY in your life
LORD
a SHINING light
your ROCK
FULL of AMAZING grace
asking you to seek His HIDDEN mysteries
calling you to TRUST in Him
HIGHLY exalted, the ROYAL king
wanting to be our FOUNDATION
FABULOUS
able to TRANSFORM our biggest messes
ready for you to celebrate His GOODNESS
MIGHTY
wanting to be your BEST FRIEND
a healing DOCTOR
PERFECT
offering you a FREE GIFT of his Son
one of whom we stand in WONDER
BEAUTIFUL, beyond description
in CONTROL!

(...And here's a picture of it all that I didn't add last time!)

Pray these descriptions of God this week. Stand in awe of who He is and ask for His strength to stay pure in a world that wants us to use these words to describe temporary things. He has a PLAN for you and wants to make Himself CLEAR to you as you seek His face. He will indeed show Himself to be WIDER and more PERFECT than we can even begin to COMPREHEND. Praise God for He is limitless!

J.O.Y.

For day two of K.I.S.S. I thought I would broaden things even more to how we can keep things simple in life.  For me, I strive to focus my life in order to have a biblical perspective to help keep things simple.

I once heard an acronym for experiencing joy.  It goes like this:

J - Jesus

O - Others

Y - Yourself

I think this is such a good, simple reminder of how to focus our priorities each day. With this acronym in mind, it helps us to know what is important and what can be left undone or saved for later.  

So many decisions and responsibilities can crowd our day, but I think this simple acronym helps to remind us, as believers, what is important in life.  Any of the simple ideas I share this week fail quickly if I don't put Christ first in my day.  God's grace allows me to even be able to complete the tasks that I outlined on yesterday's daily magnets.  

I hate to clean, and on days when I get things out of order and move myself up to the top of the list, there really isn't joy in anything I do. But God has called me to be a wife and mom and I'm so thankful for his grace in giving me such blessings.  Keeping Him at the forefront of my days helps me to focus on others before myself.

Here's a little more detail to help us in savoring JOY in our lives.

J is for Jesus: 

In Mark 12:30 we are reminded of the greatest commandment to "love the LORD your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind, and with all your strength."  As we seek to love God with all of our heart, then He must fill us with the love we need to have to love others and love ourselves rightly.

O is for Others:

The second greatest commandment, showing the order of importance, is then seen in Mark 12:31: "You shall love your neighbor as yourself."  Now, how do we love ourselves?  I think most of us would agree that we do pretty well loving ourselves.  We don't have to be taught to think of ourselves first, so we must ask God to help us to put others first.  

Y is for Yourself:

After we have focused on our Savior and others around us, then we are ready to rightly focus on ourselves. The Christian life is about laying down our own life for Christ, who laid down His life for us.  As we focus on Him and others first, we are able, with God's help to be filled with His strength to be able to see ourselves as He sees us.

How are you living simply?

Feel free to link up your posts on keeping your life simple or leave a comment helping us to focus on this today!

A few weeks ago we took Elijah to a nearby children's museum.  Now when I think museum I think about being quiet and walking around slowly looking at priceless items.  Not this museum.  It's definitely for children and a great place for their imaginations to soar.

I was most excited to take Elijah because of the different modes of transportation that he would be able to explore.  (After all, he is ALL boy!)  There is a train and an airplane to play on as well as a real police car and fire truck to discover.  I thought FOR SURE he would go crazy over these!

Not only did he not go crazy over them, I think he would have been content to stay in the toddler area and play with the blocks.  The same blocks he has at home.

When we entered the room with the fire truck, Elijah got so excited and ran right to the fire truck.  Not the real (huge) bells and whistles fire truck, but the toy fire truck right in front of him on the floor.  The one that was smaller than him.  

I couldn't believe it.  We have a toy fire truck at home.  Did Elijah not know we were at the MUSEUM?!  

And the same thing happened in the room with the train.  We have toy trains at home.  

This totally affirmed to me that we like what we know.  Not only that, but we gravitate toward what we know.  I was convicted by the Lord that this is so true in my relationship with Him.  How many days do I come before Him bringing what I already know and expect, totally missing out on the big picture of what He wants to do? 

I would also say that we expect what we know.  In Habakkuk 1:3, the Lord answers Habakkuk's cries for understanding by saying, "Look at the nations and watch — and be utterly amazed. For I am going to do something in your days that you would not believe, even if you were told."

I often come before the Lord questioning Him, already having the answer in my mind, instead of quietly waiting to see what great work He has in store.  Would I even believe if He told me?

On the way to the museum, we talked with Elijah about big fire trucks and trains we were going to see.  But in his realm of thought, the fire truck and train are to be played with at his level.  He wasn't ready to comprehend climbing and exploring on the real vehicles.  

I pray that I wouldn't be so stuck in my ways that I miss what God is preparing all around me. I pray that I won't just gravitate toward what I know.  I'm so quick to limit God and He is infinitely bigger that what I can even comprehend!

finding holiness in a dishwasher

I remember one phone conversation I had with my dad a few months back and it always makes me laugh.  I was in the kitchen when he called and he asked me what I was doing.  I told him that I was loading the dishwasher, but he heard me say I was "using the dishwasher."

We got a good laugh out of that.  It's almost as if I said I was watching grass grow or using the oven.  All things that do need input from me to possibly get started, but ultimately are doing the work themselves while I go on with other things.

This random misunderstanding got me thinking.  How often do I say I'm seeking change in my life and simply sit there (or keep going about other things), waiting for God to do all the work.
One of the best books I have ever read is The Pursuit of Holiness by Jerry Bridges.  In talking about holiness, he looks at our part combined with the Holy Spirit's part in becoming more like Christ.  He says, "we have misunderstood 'living by faith' (Galatians 2:20) to mean that no effort at holiness is required on our part.  In fact, sometimes we have even suggested that any effort on our part is "of the flesh." 

Galatians 2:20 says, "I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me."

When we look at Scripture as a whole, and not just one verse, we quickly realize that our Christian walk is not going to grow without work on our part.

Other verses that I am drawn to when thinking about this dual role in change are:

Philippians 2:12 - "Therefore, my beloved, as you have always obeyed, not as in my presence only, but now much more in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling; for it is God who works in you both to will and to do for His good pleasure."

James 2:26 - "For as the body without the spirit is dead, so faith without works is dead also."

James 2:18 - "But someone will say, "You have faith, and I have works." Show me your faith without your works, and I will show you my faith by my works."

I know (trust me) it can be easy to make excuses about the lack of transformation in our Christian life because we are (even faithfully) waiting on God to do His work in our life.  BUT there is a huge part of change that depends on us.

I know this is true, because I know that God desires for me to spend time with him, but he doesn't magically (like my dishwasher!) let me go to bed one night and wake up the next day a totally different person who never sleeps in again without reading from my Bible.  It takes an act of change in my own lifestyle and habits to be continually moving to be more like my Savior.

Of course, as believers, we are now "new creations in Christ" (2 Corinthians 5:17) with the power of the Holy Spirit at work in our lives.  So, as I have to tell myself daily, we must allow the Holy Spirit to work in us as we in turn work for change in our own life.  

Another challenge from Jerry Bridges:

We must face the fact that we have a personal responsibility for our walk of holiness.  One Sunday our pastor in his sermon said words to this effect: 'You can put away that habit that has mastered you if you truly desire to do so.'  Because he was referring to a particular habit which was no problem to me, I quickly agreed with him in my mind.  But then the Holy Spirit said to me, 'And you can put away the sinful habits that plague you if you will accept your personal responsibility for them.'"

Remember that God's "divine power has given to us all things that pertain to life and godliness," so don't just sit around and wait for yourself to get clean!  ...You may have to pull out some of your own soap and use a scrub brush at the same time as God continues to complete the work that He has begun in you! (Philippians 1:6)

a challenge to women

A friend of mine shared a great message from John Piper with me years ago and it continually resonates in my mind.  I hope it will challenge and encourage you today.

1. That all of your life—in whatever calling—be devoted to the glory of God.
2. That the promises of Christ be trusted so fully that peace and joy and strength fill your soul to overflowing.
3. That this fullness of God overflow in daily acts of love so that people might see your good deeds and give glory to your Father in heaven.
4. That you be women of the Book, who love and study and obey the Bible in every area of its teaching. That meditation on Biblical truth be the source of hope and faith. And that you continue to grow in understanding through all the chapters of your life, never thinking that study and growth are only for others.
5. That you be women of prayer, so that the Word of God would open to you; and the power of faith and holiness would descend upon you; and your spiritual influence would increase at home and at church and in the world.
6. That you be women who have a deep grasp of the sovereign grace of God undergirding all these spiritual processes, that you be deep thinkers about the doctrines of grace, and even deeper lovers and believers of these things.
7. That you be totally committed to ministry, whatever your specific role, that you not fritter your time away on soaps or ladies magazines or aimless hobbies, any more than men should fritter theirs away on excessive sports or aimless diddling in the garage. That you redeem the time for Christ and his Kingdom.
8. That, if you are single, you exploit your singleness to the full in devotion to Christ and not be paralyzed by the desire to be married.
9. That, if you are married, you creatively and intelligently and sincerely support the leadership of your husband as deeply as obedience to Christ will allow; that you encourage him in his God-appointed role as head; that you influence him spiritually primarily through your fearless tranquility and holiness and prayer.
10. That, if you have children, you accept responsibility with your husband (or alone if necessary) to raise up children who hope in the triumph of God, sharing with him the teaching and discipline of the children, and giving to the children that special nurturing touch and care that you are uniquely fitted to give.
11. That you not assume that secular employment is a greater challenge or a better use of your life than the countless opportunities of service and witness in the home the neighborhood, the community, the church, and the world. That you not only pose the question: Career vs. full time mom? But that you ask as seriously: Full time career vs. freedom for ministry? That you ask: Which would be greater for the Kingdom— to be in the employ of someone telling you what to do to make his business prosper, or to be God's free agent dreaming your own dream about how your time and your home and your creativity could make God'sbusiness prosper? And that in all this you make your choices not on the basis of secular trends or yuppie lifestyle expectations, but on the basis of what will strengthen the family and advance the cause of Christ.
12. That you step back and (with your husband, if you are married) plan the various forms of your life's ministry in chapters. Chapters are divided by various things—age, strength, singleness, marriage, employment choices, children at home, children in college, grandchildren, retirement, etc. No chapter has all the joys. Finite life is a series of tradeoffs. Finding God's will, and living for the glory of Christ to the full in every chapter is what makes it a success, not whether it reads like somebody else's chapter or whether it has in it what chapter five will have.
13. That you develop a wartime mentality and lifestyle; that you never forget that life is short, that billions of people hang in the balance of heaven and hell every day, that the love of money is spiritual suicide, that the goals of upward mobility (nicer clothes, cars, houses, vacations, food, hobbies) are a poor and dangerous substitute for the goals of living for Christ with all your might, and maximizing your joy in ministry to people's needs.
14. That in all your relationships with men you seek the guidance of the Holy Spirit in applying the Biblical vision of manhood and womanhood; that you develop a style and demeanor that does justice to the unique role God has given to man to feel responsible for gracious leadership in relation to women—a leadership which involves elements of protection and care and initiative. That you think creatively and with cultural sensitivity (just as he must do) in shaping the style and setting the tone of your interaction with men.
15. That you see Biblical guidelines for what is appropriate and inappropriate for men and women in relation to each other not as arbitrary constraints on freedom but as wise and gracious prescriptions for how to discover the true freedom of God's ideal of complementarity. That you not measure your potential by the few roles withheld but by the countless roles offered. That you turn off the TV and Radio and think about...

You can read the rest of the article here.

worship or waste?

[Hello again blogging world!]

Justin just got back from a mission trip to Ecuador.  I was so excited that he was able to go!  He and his team worked with pastors and their wives and children who gathered in a small village for a pastor's conference.  Many of them walked for days just to attend!  Justin helped lead the music, play with children, and even spoke to the pastors for a little while.  I'm so proud of him and really wish I could have been there.  We didn't get to communicate much while he was there, but in one e-mail he wrote that he wished I could be there with him, but he definitely didn't wish Elijah were there because it was just so dirty.  It's amazing the conditions others live in daily.

There were lots of new things Justin discovered on this trip.  In fact, he didn't know much of what to expect, but he did know beforehand that he would be eating a rare delicacy prepared by the villagers - the "food of the gods" - guinea pig!  Yes, I can't even believe it.  My husband has eaten a guinea pig.  (I have been sick basically the entire time since he's been home so we've hardly kissed. -boo-  But I think that's been good because surely the guinea pig aftertaste is completely out of his mouth by now! Ugh!)  

*Another side note if you want an idea of the dish he had - just Google "fried guinea pig."*

As amazing as it is that Justin has eaten guinea pig, the generosity of the people who prepared and served the guinea pig is even more amazing to me.  Before going, Justin learned that a meal of guinea pig costs about $10 for the people to serve.  These are people who (for those who actually make money) make about $40 a month!  Imagine that - taking a 1/4 of your monthly income and blessing a stranger with a meal that you don't even splurge on for your own family.  Think about that right now.  What would a 1/4 of your monthly income be and would you even fathom preparing a meal that costs that much?  We experienced this generosity on mission trips we took to Mexico as well - the giving out of their limited funds to welcome those whom they have never met.  What a picture of hospitality and service!

I'm reminded of an account of such generosity in the story of Mary as she pours out a great offering on Jesus.  In Matthew 26 we read the following:

And when Jesus was in Bethany at the house of Simon the leper, a woman came to Him having an alabaster flask of very costly fragrant oil, and she poured it on His head as He sat at the table. But when His disciples saw it, they were indignant, saying, "Why this waste? For this fragrant oil might have been sold for much and given to the poor." But when Jesus was aware of it, He said to them, "Why do you trouble the woman? For she has done a good work for Me. For you have the poor with you always, but Me you do not have always. For in pouring this fragrant oil on My body, she did it for My burial. Assuredly, I say to you, wherever this gospel is preached in the whole world, what this woman has done will also be told as a memorial to her."

As I think about the people who served Justin and his team last week, I am just amazed at their generosity.  But I admit, much like the disciples, I find myself questioning the gift. Why did they spend this money on food that may or may not even be enjoyed by people they don't even know?  In order not to see this treatment as an incredible waste, I have to view the meal as Jesus viewed Mary's gift - as an amazing act of worship.    She knew her Master as Provider, and chose to lavish upon Him, her Savior, ultimately knowing His promises to care for her.  These villagers who prepared such a sacrificial meal for Justin's team truly worshiped, showing their reliance on an unchanging Savior instead of reliance on their measly income.  

I am challenged to seek greater ways to worship my Savior through extravagant service.  I think that acts of service that are ultimately gifts of worship to our great God show the world that we serve a worthy Savior.

wonder

There is such a wonder in a child's eyes that I am so quickly falling in love with in Elijah.  Elijah causes me to stop and think about things that I might not normally think about because I'm trying to teach him about different things.  This week, Elijah's big interest has been in bird watching.  Justin taught Elijah how to sign bird, so he has been all about finding them.  There haven't been too many around in this crazy weather, but we've spent several moments at the windows and walking around looking for any bird we can find.  How sweet!  I just love how Elijah's eyes just fixate on the bird when he finally sees it.  Quite a reminder that nothing God made is unimportant.  Through Elijah's eyes, I have a renewed interest in the smaller things that didn't always grab my attention.  That's something I struggle with...losing my wonder...in the Lord, in the things He created, in the big and small ways He takes care of me every day.  I know Elijah will help me pause and think more about God's awesomeness in the little moments of the day. 

Elijah's hilarious to watch all day.  He gets excited about everything that he knows the word to.  This boy has quite the vocabulary for a (almost) one-year-old.  I keep meaning to write down the words he says, so I thought I would start here. 

Words Elijah signs:
dog
bird
more
all done
milk
fish

Words Elijah says:
ball (a gazillion times a day)
door (almost a gazillion times a day)
Jazz (azz)
Mama
Daddy
toy (Toy-ee ...to cute)
bible (Bi-buul)
baby (Ba-beeee - any time he sees a picture of a baby or himself....or in the mirror!)
banana ("nana")
window (dow)
elbow (bel-bow)
towel (toll)
more
apple (bapple)
hey
bye-bye
go
pray (pay ...too cute - see the video below!)
turtle (tu-tle)
...and many more, but probably I only understand them so I guess they don't count!

Musical Monday

I don't know about you, but there are some songs that I hate having stuck in my head and others that I hope will stay stuck so they continually remind me of Biblical truths.  Gratitude by Nichole Nordeman is one of the latter.  I was asked to accompany this song for a soloist in a wedding back in college and I'm so grateful that I was introduced to it.  The lyrics remind me of my Sunday School teacher's (*Hey Jenifer!) favorite verses that she has also brought me to love: 

"Though the fig tree should not blossom, nor fruit be on the vines,

the produce of the olive fail and the fields yield no food,

the flock be cut off from the fold and there be no herd in the stalls,

yet I will rejoice in the Lord ; I will take joy in the God of my salvation."

Habakkuk 3:17-18

I pray that God would give me a heart of continual gratitude, through the good and the bad, through the easy and the difficult...I pray this for you as well. 

Send some rain, would You send some rain?
'Cause the earth is dry and needs to drink again
And the sun is high and we are sinking in the shade

Would You send a cloud, thunder long and loud?
Let the sky grow black and send some mercy down
Surely You can see that we are thirsty and afraid

But maybe not, not today
Maybe You'll provide in other ways
And if that's the case . . .

We'll give thanks to You
With gratitude
For lessons learned in how to thirst for You
How to bless the very sun that warms our face
If You never send us rain

Daily bread, give us daily bread
Bless our bodies, keep our children fed
Fill our cups, then fill them up again tonight

Wrap us up and warm us through
Tucked away beneath our sturdy roofs
Let us slumber safe from danger's view this time

Or maybe not, not today
Maybe You'll provide in other ways
And if that's the case . . .

We'll give thanks to You
With gratitude
A lesson learned to hunger after You
That a starry sky offers a better view if no roof is overhead
And if we never taste that bread

Oh, the differences that often are between
Everything we want and what we really need

So grant us peace, Jesus, grant us peace
Move our hearts to hear a single beat
Between alibis and enemies tonight
Or maybe not, not today
Peace might be another world away
And if that's the case . . .

We'll give thanks to You
With gratitude
For lessons learned in how to trust in You
That we are blessed beyond what we could ever dream
In abundance or in need
And if You never grant us peace

But Jesus, would You please . . .

Musical Monday

Last week I helped Justin lead the music for a secretary's conference.  He asked me to sing the song "Our Hope Endures" by Natalie Grant.    I personally have not endured tragedy in my life, but I definitely know others who have and remain hopeful and joyful in the Lord in the midst of difficult circumstances. 

I love the lyrics in this song, bringing words to the questions we so often have.  But this song ultimately points us to hope in God by reminding us of His attributes.  Emmanuel - God is with us.  El Shaddai - All Sufficient.  In order to not be overwhelmed and undone by unexplained difficulties we face, we have to focus on God and who He is.  When we truly see God for who He is, we are ultimately reminded of who we are.  Sinful, broken, but overwhelmingly loved by a God who sent His Son to die for us.  Without a loving Savior to look to, our situation would be too much to endure.  I pray that your hope will endure...through whatever you are facing or will face.

OUR HOPE ENDURES
You would think only so much can go wrong
Calamity only strikes once
And you assume that this one has suffered her share
Life will be kinder from here

Sometimes the sun stays hidden for years
Sometimes the sky rains night after night
When will it clear

But our Hope endures the worst of conditions
It's more than our optimism
Let the earth quake
Our Hope is unchanged

How do we comprehend peace within pain
Our joy at a good man's wake
Walk a mile with a woman whose body is torn
With illness but she marches on

Sometimes the sun stays hidden for years
Sometimes the sky rains night after night
When will it clear

But our Hope endures the worst of conditions
It's more than our optimism
Let the earth quake
Our Hope is unchanged

Emmanuel, God is with us
El Shaddai, all sufficient

We never walk alone
This is our hope

Our Hope endures, the worst of conditions
It's more than our optimism
let the earth quake
Our Hope is unchanged

"This I recall to mind, therefore I have hope. Through the Lord's mercies we are not consumed, because His compassions fail not.  They are new every morning; Great is Your faithfulness.  'The Lord is my portion.' says my soul, 'Therefore I hope in Him!'"  Lamentations 3:21-24

Cry It Out

Elijah is my sweet baby boy and only 8 months old, but a lot of training has already been going on in his life.  Actually, since about his second week of life, because I chose to take a parent-led approach to raising him, based on the Baby Wise series of books.  After seeing other moms implement this approach with their children, I was sold, and can see the Biblical implications of such training.  (Please visit this blog to learn all you could possibly want to know about the Baby Wise approach!)

No matter what your philosophy of child-rearing, I hope you will read this post with an open mind.  Even with an 8 month old, I have already learned so much more about God from the opportunity he has given me to be a parent.  My goodness - the love I have for that tiny baby boy is almost more than I can handle some days and just puts me in awe of our Creator who loves me so much more than I can imagine. 

A part of the Baby Wise approach is establishing a good sleeping pattern for your child, which can involve allowing your child to cry it out sometimes while training them.  (This is where I may lose some of you...but please hang in there!)  In the beginning of our sleep training with Elijah, there were nights when I knew he wasn't hungry, he didn't need changed and was just waking up out of habit.  This was when I knew I was going to have to lead him as a parent.  It wasn't easy, but I had to let him cry it out some nights until he could learn to put himself to sleep.  I wanted to "start as I meant to go on" (which I've either read from Baby Wise or the Baby Whisperer), meaning that I did not want to have a 6 month old that needed rocking/a pacifier/a bottle getting him back to sleep. 

By the time Elijah was about 10 weeks old, he was sleeping 8 hours at night.  Now he sleeps 11 hours at night, consistently.  He is happy with our routine and knows what to expect each day.  We eat, play, and sleep in that order!  It also keeps me sane...knowing what to expect as a framework for the day.  (Check out a Baby Wise book if you want to know more). 

I tell you all this (even though I know it can be controversial) because of a great way this has illustrated God's love in an even bigger way to me. 

On the nights that I would stand right outside of Elijah's room, wanting so badly to intervene and pick him up, I had to keep reminding myself of the ultimate goal: good sleep!  In the big picture, I wanted Elijah to sleep well and transition through sleep cycles on his own so that he could get the best sleep.  On those nights, it seemed so crazy to hear his cries and not respond, so I had to rely on the Lord for strength.  In those moments, He showed me that He is always right there listening to my cries when things aren't going the way I want them to or something has hurt me so badly.  In my view of things, it seems crazy sometimes that God can't just fix things to be "good" for me right then.  But God has the big picture.  He knows what I need and knows what is for my greater good and His glory.  God's sovereignty is so hard to wrap my brain around, but I'm so thankful that He is in control.  I am calmed by that realization, not offended by it. 

Are there areas of your relationship with God that have been hurt by questioning why He didn't come pick you up when you were crying?  Confess those to Him today.  He already knows your pain and knows what is best for your growth, to lead you closer to Him.  Allow God to do the work that He wants to do in your life - to bring you to the ultimate goal He has for you. 

Psalm 56:8 says, "You have kept count of my tossings, put my tears in your bottle."  What a good God He is to care about even the tiniest aspects of our lives.  He knows about every tear we shed!

Jeremiah 29:11 says, "I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for wholeness and not evil, to give you a future and a hope."  Don't allow Satan to challenge this truth in your life.  Read Romans 8:28 and rest in a God who loves you so much and has a specific plan for your good and His glory!

What are some ways God has revealed a greater understanding of Himself to you through your children?

death is not dying

I have been meaning to post a link for forever.

So, here: www.deathisnotdying.com

If you haven't seen this video by now, it is well worth your time. We watched it as a Sunday School Class a while back and it is one of the most eloquent testimonies to the Lord's goodness that I have ever heard. It's about 55 minutes long, but please take time to watch. It's a testimony by Rachel Barkey who faced a tough battle with breast cancer, then terminal cancer.

Here's a quote from her:

"Cancer does not define me. Neither does being a wife or a mother. All these things are part of who I am but they do not define me. What defines me is my relationship with Jesus."

I encourage you - if you are going through a difficult season right now, or have gone through a troubling experience and don't understand where God fits into such a struggle - please watch this video with a heart longing to comprehend how God is still a good God in the midst of trials. I pray that you will be blessed by Rachel's story and drawn closer to God by her encouraging life and words.

christmas in july!

And in the same region there were shepherds out in the field, keeping watch over their flock by night. And an angel of the Lord appeared to them, and the glory of the Lord shone around them, and they were filled with fear. And the angel said to them, “Fear not, for behold, I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people. For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Savior, who is Christ the Lord. And this will be a sign for you: you will find a baby wrapped in swaddling cloths and lying in a manger.”

And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God and saying,
“Glory to God in the highest,and on earth peace among those with whom he is pleased!”

When the angels went away from them into heaven, the shepherds said to one another, “Let us go over to Bethlehem and see this thing that has happened, which the Lord has made known to us.” And they went with haste and found Mary and Joseph, and the baby lying in a manger. And when they saw it, they made known the saying that had been told them concerning this child. And all who heard it wondered at what the shepherds told them. But Mary treasured up all these things, pondering them in her heart. And the shepherds returned, glorifying and praising God for all they had heard and seen, as it had been told them.

Luke 2:8-20

For some reason I am constantly thinking about this verse that I bolded and italicized. I'm not quite sure why. But honestly, I feel that God is continually putting this in my mind to challenge me to be more like Mary. And who wouldn't want to be more like Mary? ...The mother of Jesus? ...The one God chose to deliver His only Son?

I do long to follow the example of Mary in more ways than one, but I specifically want to learn how to ponder things in my heart, as she did at such a significant point in her life. One that we still read about and focus on at least once a year.

So...I try to constantly think of how to take in and remember each moment...especially ones with Justin and Elijah. Problem is, my memory is terrible and I'm honestly bad at just being in the moment sometimes. So I tell myself I'll scrapbook. (Hasn't happened yet, but I have enough photos to fill a scrapbook library). I tell myself I'll journal. (Works for a day or two...and then a day or two again a month later). Obviously I'm terrible at this. But I want so badly to treasure up these moments that I have now with my sweet baby boy and be able to remember them fondly and as clearly as possible. So, I need your help. What are some ways you try to hold on to the wonder of the memories you are currently making? Are you a scrapbooker? Journaler? Writer? What are some ways you have found to remember and continue enjoying the moments you have with your family or friends? I'd love to hear about them and begin implementing some of my own!

an endless list

I just got back from an amazing weekend at the Women's Prayer & Evangelism Conference. God is so good and I was able to hear from some gifted women who have encouraged me to renew my personal prayer life in fresh ways. So...when I got home tonight, eager to begin with my new prayer journal, I wanted to begin with praise, preparing my journal for exciting reminders of who God is. God quickly gave me the idea of pulling out magazines I had around the house and starting on a "collage" of words that portray names and descriptions of who He is. As I turned the pages again and again, it was not difficult to cut out an abundance of words that describe our Heavenly Father.

The reason this was easy, however, was because advertisements use so many descriptions to describe their products that are actually words meant to describe the One True God. I was convicted again. How many times am I sold on products to make me better, prettier, etc., things that can easily become idols in my life? Ask God to reveal to you what people or things have taken His place. What words do you use to describe insignificant things that should maybe be reserved for worshipping Him alone? Believer, be renewed today in your definition of who God is. If you have yet to know a relationship with God, read the following list, knowing that God wants to become these qualities in your life! The capitalized words are the ones I found (in just 3 secular magazines) to just begin to describe God. Let me know what names God has given you lately. How has He revealed Himself to you?

God is....

the PERFECTOR of our faith
standing with ARMS WIDE OPEN
PERSONAL
longing to be your DAD
our ROCK
saying "I WANT TO HOLD YOUR HAND"
LIFE
waiting to be your EVERYTHING
CLOSE to you at all times
JOYFUL as He sings over you
still in the work of SAVING those who are lost
FLAWLESS
longing to SATISFY your every desire
AVAILABLE to CALM every stress, every fear, every worry
waiting for you to see his VISION
THE KEY to ETERNITY
the ONLY true answer
MASTER
the FREEDOM you are longing for
MORE than you can ever imagine
I AM
EVERYWHERE, watching and listening 24 HOURS, 7 days a week, and he NEVER SLEEPS
WATER to our thirsty, dry bones
STRONGER than our strongest moment
a JUST God, DIVINELY ruling His creation, and always RIGHT
waiting for you to COME AS YOU ARE
coveting a RELATIONSHIP with you
LORD over all
the only One who truly RADIATES WARMTH
to be TREASURED greatly
THE ONE, THE ONLY
still doing works BEYOND our comprehension
POWERFUL
wanting to speak to you through His LOVE LETTER
AGELESS
our SOLUTION
in CONTROL
ULTIMATE
our GUIDE
ready to COMMUNICATE in a PERSONAL way with you DAILY
BEAUTIFUL
the One who CHANGES EVERYTHING
STRENGTHENING
a God of HARMONY
offering you REST
RESTORATIVE
wanting to be your CLOSEST FRIEND
able to claim VICTORY in your life
LORD
a SHINING light
your ROCK
FULL of AMAZING grace
asking you to seek His HIDDEN mysteries
calling you to TRUST in Him
HIGHLY exalted, the ROYAL king
wanting to be our FOUNDATION
FABULOUS
able to TRANSFORM our biggest messes
ready for you to celebrate His GOODNESS
MIGHTY
wanting to be your BEST FRIEND
a healing DOCTOR
PERFECT
offering you a FREE GIFT of his Son
one of whom we stand in WONDER
BEAUTIFUL, beyond description
in CONTROL!

Pray these descriptions of God this week. Stand in awe of who He is and ask for His strength to stay pure in a world that wants us to use these words to describe temporary things. He has a PLAN for you and wants to make Himself CLEAR to you as you seek His face. He will indeed show Himself to be WIDER and more PERFECT than we can even begin to COMPREHEND. Praise God for He is limitless!

church family...

...is one of the greatest things in life. I just left praise team rehearsal tonight, and every time I leave I am so thankful to be around believers and people who are focused on taking time out of their week to prepare for upcoming worship services. There is just nothing like the fellowship of the Church. I love that I get to work with Christians each day - I know that everyone does not have that work environment. I love that you know you can share prayer requests that others will take seriously and have compassion on. I love that I know others who are working behind the scenes in church each week, not ever expecting to get any recognition. What a privilege to know people who truly love the Lord and it shows!

I am so saddened when I hear people say that they don't go to church because of the hypocrites that they know in church. Of course, everyone in church is not perfect - we're human. But I'm thankful to be a part of a church where I daily see the genuine love and grace of those around me. What a great testimony to those around! If you are reading this and have been hurt by someone in church - I'm sorry. If you are not connected in a church, I urge you to keep looking for a church that is welcoming and where the preacher is real and true to the Bible. Don't quit looking if you haven't found that yet. Church is an essential element in a Christian's life. There is nothing like having a supportive, God-glorifying church family.

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Side note: Happy 100th post to me! It's been a long road to 100 - not as celebratory as I'd hoped it would be, so I'm working toward a party at #200! Stick with me :)

taking every thought captive...easier said than done!

2 Corinthians 10:3-6

For though we walk in the flesh, we are not waging war according to the flesh. For the weapons of our warfare are not of the flesh but have divine power to destroy strongholds. We destroy arguments and every lofty opinion raised against the knowledge of God, and take every thought captive to obey Christ, being ready to punish every disobedience, when your obedience is complete.

These verses have intrigued me ever since discussing them in a women's bible study this past year. We looked at what exactly it means to "take every thought captive" and discussed how difficult this can truly be for each of us. Our minds were stirred when we began to define "taking every thought captive" by "thinking about every thought." This may seem redundant and even confusing, but to me, it makes a lot of sense, especially in conjunction with Philippians 4:8.

So often during the day, thoughts enter my head that are simply NOT TRUE. And every day I have to simply (yeah, right) think about every thought. Since working out and eating right is currently my big struggle, here's some of those untrue thoughts I deal with:

"If I don't eat this piece of cake now, I'll never get to enjoy it" - NOT TRUE, because even if I don't eat it now, it will still be there later...if I decide to eat it then.

"The waitress placed these hushpuppies here, I must eat them" - NOT TRUE, because no one is holding a gun to my head, making me eat them. (Dealt with this just tonight at dinner!!)

"If I go workout I won't have time to wash the dishes!" - NOT TRUE...just an excuse...odds are I'm not going to wash the dishes then, anyway!! Oh, my thoughts are deceiving!!

Ok, so these are corny examples, but the best I can think of right now. You get the picture, though. It is easier said that done to "take every thought captive" and think about "whatever is true." Especially those tiny, apparently unharmful thoughts. But God knew we needed practical passages like these to spur us into a greater relationship with Him.

Our lying thoughts can display themselves in so many ways. What thoughts do you need to continually take captive? For me, its usually thoughts of inadequacy when ministering to young pregnant women at work, thoughts of the food I just HAVE to have, thoughts of laziness when I need to be productive, etc, etc.

When looking at 2 Corinthians 10, we see that Paul is talking about spiritual warfare. I had to stop and think... am I applying this correctly in my life? Well, for me, when I am letting my fleshly desires for food and laziness rule my life, I am less than effective for God's kingdom. When I am struggling with these issues and relying on Christ to help me take every thought captive, I am then relying on His strength to help me overule my fleshly desires...desires that Satan can so easily (unfortunately) use to make me less effective in kingdom work.

One commentary puts it this way - "[Paul] took captive to the obedience of Christ every perception and intention of the heart that was against God. Our actions reveal our thoughts. We should not cling to thoughts that do not conform to the life and teachings of Christ. Paul did not walk according to the flesh or his worldly desires; instead he conquered the flesh. He explains his strategy in 1 Cor. 9:24-27: 'I discipline my body and bring it into subjection.'" (Nelson's New Illustrated Bible Commentary)

One word I am no good at - discipline. Another word I am obviously not so good at - obedience. Thankfully God is so patient with me! Thankfully I am not left to work through my struggles on my own! I want to be honest with you all. As God is working in my life, I hope to encourage you as well. I also feel that it keeps me more accountable to put things in writing.

As God helps me to be more disciplined in these areas of my life, I pray that He will allow me to serve Him in even larger areas...all for His glory!

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Apparently my seminary days are still with me...I didn't mean to write you a paper!!

Oh, and even though we went to a seafood restaurant tonight where I would usually eat a "heart attack on a plate" dinner, I chose broiled flounder, side salad, and steamed veggies. Not one hush puppy touched my lips even though Justin made it very clear how unbelievably good they were! I must say, I felt much better than if I would have eaten an entired fried plate of food. One victory at a time :)

I'm back...I think!

So...I've never been a gym member...not really my thing, I guess. :) How interesting that it quickly becomes "your thing" when you're 8 years out of high school, no longer playing sports (for the past 8 years), not walking around a college campus anymore, married and getting fat. Anyone there with me?? (please say yes!) Yes...I'm just plain getting fat. I know that can be a relative term...but I know it's true for me.

I know it's true because I have clothes in my closet that are four sizes smaller and haven't been worn for years. (I'm definitely holding on to the past!)

I know it's true because I get winded when walking the steps a few times in our house.

I know it's true because I somedays I'd rather wear Justin's gym shorts than squeeze into my own (sooo sad).

Anyways...you get the idea...it's time to face reality. Amazingly, God is so patient with me. My eating habits and lack of exercise are too often acts of flat out disobedience and definitely not respectful of this earthly body God has given me. Knowing this, I've prayed and prayed for God to help me eat well and have the discipline to get up and work out. He's given me the desire (which I know is definitely Him, not me). Now it's time to do my part and work along side the Holy Spirit's work in my life. No more being lazy.

This is where you come in. (Yes...you...reading this!) Help me...pray for me...ask me how the workouts are going...encourage me to eat well. I know you will because I know if you're reading this you care about me or atleast care about reading what I have to say. So...thanks for your support.

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Now...to share the gym stories...

I haven't officially joined the gym yet. Last Friday started my free trial week and I plan to join after its over. I actually heard about this gym that is right down the road from our house from a sweet "Senior Saint" in our church. I wanted to check it out because its literally 30 seconds down the street if I drive...so I knew even I could get myself up to drive 30 seconds to a gym! (A minute might be pushing it! - sadly, I know my own nature).

I went last Thursday to checkout the facility, had a tour from a nice lady, but couldn't help noticing that everyone working out at the time as well as my tour guide was over 50. Not that I have a problem with older women, but I was starting to wonder if this was the place for me. I continued getting the tour...nice equipment...beautiful, feminine decor (it's a women's only gym)...friendly people...nice pitchers of water to enjoy...puzzle to work on while you cool down...nice locker room, you know...very modern. But...rewind..."puzzle to work on???" Yes...this is the moment that I seriously thought, "This might just be an old lady gym!" I mean, the only place I know that has puzzles laying out to work on is in the retirement home! I was seriously laughing inside and probably always will when I walk past the puzzle table!

I kept an open mind, however, and came in Friday for my first workout. Same old scenario...everyone was over 50 when I got there. Eventually, a few women in their 40's came in...I started to not feel so young. It honestly hadn't bothered me though, because the last thing I need for my self-esteem is a gorgeous 20 year old working out right beside me. I feel great when I'm surpassing the women around me (even if it's because they have back problems or something!)

Today was the first day I've gone back since last week. I just did not want to get out of bed before work on Monday and Tuesday. I am not a morning person in the first place so every day is a battle to get up without snoozing 10 times. Well, my workout today was great. AND there were some women there a lot closer to my age!! That excites me. One of the reasons I want to go to the gym is to meet some ladies in the community. Hopefully I can build some relationships while working out. Gotta bring as many positives to this workout scenario as I can!!

I look forward to working out more. I have felt great both days when I worked out. Working out always makes me more conscious about my food choices as well. Unfortunately, as the day goes by I start to be more slack about my choices. I've been trying not to eat after 8, which gets difficult when Justin doesn't eat until after choir practice on Wednesdays. So...we headed out to McDonald's tonight to get him some dinner. I was weak and had a Hot Fudge Sunday, but...surely it balances out since we walked there! Yes...that's right...I truely have too much temptation before me every day. McDonald's is RIGHT ACROSS THE STREET from our house. Honestly and sadly, my biggest weakness. I'm proud to announce however, that I have not had fried food in 15 days! Quite an accomplishment for me, the ultimate fry lover.

Anyways...I'm rambling...but hopefully giving you an idea of how desperately I need your prayers and encouragement. I know us women have to stick together!! Thanks for letting me be honest!